My love affair with Pa June 24, 2010

Brooke and I just finished reading the Laura Ingalls Wilder series of books, Little House on the Prairie. One of the highlights of my own childhood, I was more excited than her each night to find out what Laura would be up to in tonight’s chapter. To further her love of all things Little House I decided to buy her the DVD of Little House on the Prairie, the TV series, Season One. With great anticipation I ripped open the package when it arrived and presented it eagerly to Brooke. Then I had a moment of panic. What if she didn’t like it? What if she thought it was stupid? Never fear, this is flesh of my flesh. This is Brooke. She’s hooked.

Tonight we watched three episodes, and Chris and Zach even joined us. I was surprised to discover that Chris did not watch the show when he was a kid. While I was getting reacquainted with the characters, the rest of my family was meeting them for the first time. That mean old Nellie Olsen and her even meaner mother. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree….. Sweet Mary and spunky Laura. The well loved old dog, Jack. And then there’s Ma and Pa. I just love Ma and Pa. After the fourteenth exclamation of  my love for Ma and Pa, I was met with some serious eye rolling from across the room where the male creatures sat. I did get a little grin from Chris.

And that is when it hit me. All my young life I was looking for my own Pa. Now let me clarify, I had the best Dad ever, but here I am talking about Pa in a more romantic way. I can now see that from a young age I wanted to marry Pa. I think I am still in love with him. In fact, as I sat there mooning over Pa and hearing Zach snicker I looked up and saw Chris and had that “Aha moment” that can only come after watching seven hours of Little House on the Prairie episodes. I had, in fact, married Pa, and he was sitting across the room from me.

Suddenly all the stress of the day vanished. The sky cleared and the birds sang. Well, almost. Since I met Chris I have marveled that someone so different than me could make such a good partner. But he does. He balances out so much of my unevenness. I put the silver lining on his gray cloud. We also drive each other crazy some days. It’s totally refreshing and totally exasperating all at the same time. But now I am clear: he is my Pa. Now don’t get twisted on me, here. Remember, it’s nothing weird or Oedipus- like.

I’ve always thought Chris was a misplaced country boy. I truly think he would be happy on a farm. And although I require a Target within 10 miles of my home, I have always loved this about Chris. The way he understands and loves nature. The way he can build anything he sets his mind to build (there is a boat being built in our backyard, after all). The way he grows a garden in the middle of the city. The way he cuts through the bull and sees the simplicity of things. The core honesty he carries with him. He is Charles Ingalls.

And then there is Ma. I cannot adequately express my love for Ma. She is pretty, kind and patient. But she also stands up for the underdog, fights injustice and makes a mean birthday cake on a wood fire. Ma is everything I hope to be. A pioneering woman, who loves her family first, but never forgets her neighbor. She churns her butter, hangs her clothes outside to dry in the fresh air and sells her eggs to Mrs. Olsen. She is a multi-tasker on the open range. Love that gal. Reminds me of who I want to be on my best day. Helps me understand why my best day is the day I spend outside with the breeze blowing, the kids playing and a cold cup of lemonade at my side.

Who would have thought so many of my aspirations were wrapped up in one TV show? Who would have thought.

The real Charles and Caroline Ingalls

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